Too Many Tabs Open: A Journey of Searching and Simplifying

Have you ever looked at your computer and realized you have too many tabs open? Each one represents something important — or at least it seemed important when you opened it. Now, those tabs are slowing everything down, cluttering your screen, and making it nearly impossible to focus. That’s been my life this past year.

In 2024, I had more tabs open in my life than I could count. I’d started a notary business, ventured into being a transaction coordinator, taken an insurance class (which I ended up dropping), continued in my real estate career, and tried my hand at affiliate sales on TikTok and Amazon. I even got certified as a foreclosure inspector. Each new venture felt like a lifeline — a way to make money in a world where my real estate career and the market were tanking. But here’s the problem: none of those things were what I truly wanted to do.

Deep down, I knew what I wanted. I want to simplify. I want to create beautiful things, to write, to inspire. I want to learn herbal medicine and healing, to connect with God through His creation and the natural world. I want a life of peace, beauty, and intention. But the tyranny of unpaid bills and mounting collections kept pulling me back into the weeds, chasing opportunities that didn’t resonate with my soul.

I’ve never wanted to be a great salesperson or to chase “success” as the world defines it. What I want is something else entirely. I want to share my journey and inspire others who feel the same pull toward a simpler, more meaningful life. But, as inspiring as that sounds, it doesn’t change the fact that money is still a necessity.

2024: A Year of Searching and Sorting

Looking back, I can see that 2024 was my year of searching. It was like trying on shoes to see which ones fit. Some paths seemed promising at first, but I quickly realized they weren’t leading me where I wanted to go. The notary business? Too transactional. The transaction coordinator work? Too tedious. Insurance? Not my passion. Selling affiliate products? A grind that didn’t feel authentic. Real estate? It’s been a rollercoaster, and frankly, I’m ready to step off.

Every venture taught me something though, even if it just confirmed what I didn’t want. And for that, I’m grateful. But it’s exhausting to be in constant pursuit, only to find dead ends. The weight of those tabs — the unfinished projects, the unmet goals, the financial stress — has been crushing.

2025: Closing the Tabs and Starting Fresh

As 2025 begins, I’m ready to close some tabs, not in failure, but in clarity. I’m learning to prioritize what truly matters to me and to let go of what doesn’t align with my soul. This year, my focus is on:

1. Simplifying My Life: Saying no to opportunities that distract me from my true purpose.

2. Creating Beauty: Writing, crafting, and sharing inspiration.

3. Learning and Growing: Delving into herbal medicine, natural healing, and traditional skills.

4. Connecting: With God, with nature, and with like-minded people.

But here’s the challenge: I still need to make money. How do I align my passion for a simpler, more meaningful life with the practical need to pay the bills? That’s the puzzle I’m determined to solve this year.

Inspiring Others While Building My Dream

I know I’m not alone in this struggle. So many of us are searching for something more — something deeper and more authentic than the hustle-and-grind culture we’re told to chase. My hope is that by sharing my journey, I can inspire others to find their own path.

This blog is my first step. It’s a place to document the messy, beautiful process of closing tabs and building a life that aligns with my values. It’s a space to explore the tension between financial realities and soulful living. And it’s a way to connect with others who are on similar journeys.

The Year Ahead

As I step into 2025, my goal is to focus on the right things and let go of the rest. I don’t have all the answers yet, but I’m committed to finding a way to live simply, beautifully, and intentionally — and to make a living while doing it. It’s time to close the tabs and start fresh.

If you’ve ever felt overwhelmed by too many tabs open in your life, I invite you to join me on this journey. Let’s simplify, create, and inspire together. Here’s to a new year and a clearer screen.

Tamara Bernal

January 2025